'Suspiria' Remake Stumbling Block Is the Need for Logical Plot.

You make a good point logboy. It makes me pull my hair to know that these people probably just said, "hey, what successful horror movie can we remake now that will make us a ton of money," without even thinking if the damn thing can be done without throwing today's audience for a loop. A pickle they have found themselves in.

Part of me, probably the sane part, says "Good. This remake should never have happened in the first place, and I hope it never does." The stupider, more optimistic part of me hopes they eventually comprehend what they're working with and decide that a less logic-based and more dreamlike approach is in order here. If they really had a pair, they'd do the remake with kids, per Argento's original wishes. A gory, hard-R Suspiria with a cast of children. Yeah, that'll happen.

i don't think the original should have ever been made. what a piece of crap.

JASON, you don't know anything about cinema, if you don't like suspiria.

For the love of god why can't these people leave well enough alone? Argento is one person whose films need never be remade. By ANYONE for ANY REASON. It's just unnatural.

Yes, we live in a time when the arts are technically advanced, but imaginatively bankrupt. Hence, the remake factory. You cannot take an idiosyncratic director like Argento and force him into a cookie-cutter horror film. Like him or not, his films are from a time when directors were allowed to follow their vision, for better or worse. The film industry is run by bean-counters now.

Yes, we live in a time when the arts are technically advanced, but imaginatively bankrupt. Hence, the remake factory. You cannot take an idiosyncratic director like Argento and force him into a cookie-cutter horror film. Like him or not, his films are from a time when directors were allowed to follow their vision, for better or worse. The film industry is run by bean-counters now.

I predict that if this remake ever got made, the plot would have been thus:

Suzy would have been played by Jessica Alba, who's attending a hip hop school in the hood, where the other girls are totally mean and totally jealous of her, like, awesome dancing and stuff. Of course the movie would be PG-13, so the first death, so lovingly detailed by Argento in the original, would now consist of some nameless actress from the WB stubbing her big toe.